Another Casualty

After nine plus years filled with triumphs, challenges, learning, contemplation and strife, alas I am the latest casualty of our crappy economy.

Tuesday morning I thought I was walking into to my usual bi-weekly catch up session with my boss, but no. She wasn't in her usual "let's catch up" mode, but suspiciously somber. I noticed, but I continued on with sharing my triumphant stories about Chayse hiking 7+ miles over the weekend and the first backpacking trip being a success. But I don't think she was really listening.

Then it was her turn. I didn't really soak in all that she was saying. "Um, Hope the Communications Director position is not being renewed in next year's budget, effective July 1." I think that's how she put it. She went on to explain that HR will be meeting with me at noon, it looks like my Web manager will be spared for now, I have nine weeks of severance pay, and she was really very sorry. She's my biggest fan. And then it sunk in. It finally happened. I'm being "RIF"-fed.

I have survived at least three or four large layoff or reorganization sessions in the last almost 10 years. It was bound to happen sometime. And I'm the first to admit that the new dean isn't a fan. Not that he's even tried to learn enough about me and my talents to be a fan or not. But I digress...

Budget cuts have been the norm for as long as I've worked on "Pill Hill." I have seen too many talented people cut from budgets over the years. I guess that's why I am trying to not take it personally. But it's hard not to feel the blow to the ego. I've been their faithful employee for more than a quarter of my life. I've weathered seven bosses. And I can honestly say I tried to always put out my best work. It's hard to let go of all that I've put my blood, sweat and tears into. But I guess now it's time.

What is it time for? That's the question I've been wanting to answer for a few years.

I think it's time to try my hand at standing on my own two feet and put all these skills that I've learned over the last almost 10 years into practice. Take a stab at the freelance world.

My on the job training was challenging at times. But I discovered a lot of my weaknesses and even more strengths and passions. And now I have new skills that I never imagined I would have prior to working this job. I guess I can say that's 10 years well spent. And really, what more can you ask from employment? Other than paying the bills of course.

Today's To Do: Wrap it all up. Pass the baton to my wide-eyed not so lucky boss.

Tomorrow's To Do: Finish my Web site. Contact everyone I've ever worked with in communications. Sell, sell, sell. Work, work, work. Earn some bacon.

This moment To Do: Take a break, go to the beach, jump a few waves and play hard. Savor Chayse's laughter and smiles. Breathe.